Scholarship
Original
Revision
Reflective Narrative
The work I chose to revise was a paragraph analysis of the life of Fredrick Douglas. This was written during my sophomore year as part of my AP Language class. I reworked this largely from the ground up. Keeping the original thesis allowed me to reconstruct the analysis to be a better fitting examination of what my writing style and abilities have grown into. Predominately I focused on the evidence that I chose and in doing so I have created a more compelling argument to support my thesis.
Integrity
2015 Toyota Camery
Much like the very literal unibody frame of the 2015 Toyota Camry, integrity is embedded into the very core of my life plan. The Camry blends into traffic seamlessly; nothing about it makes it particularly visually unique, and this aligns closely with my fairly plain outward appearance. The main component holding the Camry together is the bolts that attach the panels to the unibody frame, and the bolts in my life would be my strong familial connection that brings a sense of wholeness to my life. The front strut and the rear double wishbone suspension allow the Camry to roll over the difficulties of the road, and the suspension to my life would be my love for music as an outlet, both creating and enjoying the passionate art of others. The steel panels of the Camry create durable and reliable protection to the car, in the same vein my steady commitment to completing my goals is what ensures I will accomplish what I set out to do. The 2015 Toyota Camry is driven forward by a 3.5 liter V6 and I am driving forward by my desire to effect positive change in the lives of those around me.
Reflection
I am now 18 years old and am at the end of my Senior year of High School. I have spent my 4 years of High School at Great Oak and now am committed to continuing my academic career at the University of California, Davis, to earn a Political Science degree with an emphasis on International Relations. In my time at Great Oak, I have solidified my future as a person who wishes to do good in the world through advocacy and personal responsibility. While I do still struggle at times with maintaining academic excellence, the past 4 years have taught me how to work effectively to reach my goals. In terms of my writing, I believe I have developed a specific voice when constructing arguments and essays, both personal and academic, that allows me to communicate my ideas in a way that is accessible and professional. In further developing a specific voice my writing, I have grown more confident and thoughtful in my analysis.